I’ve had a few perfect days before. As I reflect on them, I realize they all involve a trip we took. Escaping reality can make for quite a lovely day, right?
But, if we are honest, reality is everywhere. We cannot hide from it no matter how many frequent flyer miles we use. I, for one, have not found a healthy way to stop thinking thoughts. To get anyone to want to do all the things my way. To truly be present in a moment for more than a few at a time. Every life-changing trip we’ve taken has arguments smattered throughout. Sometimes, work stress reared its ugly head. Other times, wrong sides of the bed abounded. It’s possible that someone said the wrong thing and ruined a morning somewhere in paradise. After all, our humanity never fails to get packed in the bags somewhere.
We sat at our favorite beach the other night. It is absolutely my favorite place to be — outside of travel. After a loooong winter and stupidly long Spring (did April and May last about 184 days for everyone or just me??), it was beach time. I was the MOST excited to approach my favorite sights, smells, and sounds.
I’m not sure I even sat down before I found things to do. Playing with my new camera gear, moving things around, looking for beach glass, getting things for people…eventually, I sat in a chair and the restlessness while sitting made me feel crazy. I literally said, “I am having the hardest time sitting here!”
What is so very hard about relaxing???? Is it just me? I am always planning, considering words and everyone else’s feelings, how I am coming across, what the next thing is and the next and next. I find my brain full like an overstuffed belly after Thanksgiving, all. of . the. time.
And this, when my schedule involves fewer out-of-the-house activities than usual!
Have we done this to ourselves? I’m sure it’s true. Why is it just so very hard to be still? Who created these expectations for me? Obviously, I did. The ones I imagine others have for me are probably just that — imagined. This is my next get-real issue I plan to explore. Just God and me. I’m thinking there’s some real stuff to uncover here. Sigh.
So, if I had a perfect day, it would be free from expectation — my own or anyone else’s. I would literally spend the entire day at the beach where it is 80 degrees and cloud-free. I would have a riveting book to read, a comfy sand bed, a tube in which to float in 74 degree water. My little cooler would have the best food — not made by me. Snacks would be involved that contained no guilt of any kind — ahhhhh…that icy cold Mountain Dew in a can would be grand (cannot even tell you the last time!). Eventually, my excited-to-be-together family including grandbabies would all show up with more food (not prepared by me), and we would all swim and watch the sun set from our bonfire circle. No bugs allowed at my perfect day. And no one cares about work or money — no drama allowed. And when we get home, the sand all miraculously fell off before we even got to the house and the beach items all put themselves away while we, smelling of campfire and marshmallows slip into dreamland.
Or my sweet man and I find ourselves in Kauai for 3 weeks. Either way.